And That’s When the Creepy Guy Took My Picture

1 Aug

This weekend featured two days of running. At this rate, I’ll be running ultra-marathons by next weekend. Saturday was long run day, as it always is. I was supposed to do 12 miles. Ha! This run sucked from beginning to end. I didn’t get enough sleep the night before, I didn’t fuel properly before or during the run, and I definitely didn’t hydrate properly.

It was boiling hot and hideously humid, as it has been for all of recent memory. I set out on the W&OD Trail which is where I do all my long runs. I felt great at first and was holding a faster than usual pace (so just above snail’s pace as opposed to just below). I forced myself to slow down hoping that I wouldn’t burn out later on the run, but it didn’t matter. By mile three I was fading. At mile four I decided to turn out. I convinced myself that I would do the remaining four miles at home on the treadmill. I am awesome at deluding myself. Denial is another specialty.  At that point, I was hot and tired but truly thought I could finish the run on the treadmill.

Then things got weird. I ate a pack of sport beans and set off on the return route. About a quarter mile in, my stomach started to cramp (I was out of my usual fuel Shot Bloks and Gu) so I pulled off to the side to stretch and breathe for a minute, and this random guy who had sort of been drafting me pulled off a few feet ahead. The W&OD trail is typically fairly crowded and I never feel unsafe, so I didn’t think much of this guy.

I set off again and so did this guy. Also, I feel it should be noted that he was wearing track pants in 90+ degree weather. If the fact that he was semi-following me wasn’t creepy enough, wearing pants in that weather certainly qualifies him for creepy-guy status. I’d gotten my headphones tangled so I slowed down to untangle the cord and creepy guy walks over to me and the following conversation ensued:

CG (Creepy Guy, duh): “Um, hey where does this trail lead?”

Me: “Closer to the city that way, farther into VA over that way.”

CG: “Oh, ok I’m not from around here, so I was just curious.”

Me: “Uh-huh.”

CG: “Hey, by the way, you have really great legs, do you run often?”

Me: “Yes.”

I had zero desire to continue this conversation at this point given the incredibly pathetic attempt at a pick-up line. I turned to start running again and the dude was awkwardly trying to take a photo of my behind with his phone without my noticing it. Um, excuse me but that is absolutely not ok. I gave him the death glare and I think he realized he’d been busted. Then I turned and took off and held my fastest pace of the entire run for nearly half a mile. Nothing like the desire to run from creepers to get you moving.

Then I felt like I might hurl, so I slowed down to an almost walk and guzzled some water. I alternated walking and running for the next couple miles, around miles 6 my mom called, and since I hadn’t spoken to her all week I answered the phone. I spent a mile-and-a-half trying to talk and run and then gave up. I walked most of the last half mile home (8 miles total) and just called it day.

I decided I would run on Sunday and just call it training for the upcoming Ragnar Relay.

Sunday Track Fail

Sunday I planned to run 4 miles on the track. I did well for the first two miles and then I decided to play with my camera instead of run, because obviously that it is a totally productive use of my time. I learned how to work the self-timer so instead of running I did this for 15 mins:

Let's disco!

Please don’t judge, my self-esteem can’t handle it. There was no one at the track so I was perfectly within my rights to sing and dance to my music. I ran another mile and then this happened:

Heat fail

You just cannot win in this weather. It’s only a matter of time before the heat destroys you. Also, I should have taken this picture while lying on the grass. The track was frighteningly hot and I had to wait 10 extremely long seconds for the self-timer to work.

But then I went home and properly refueled with a Starbucks frappacino.

So overall running this weekend just sort of sucked. I’m ready to move to the South Pole to get away from this heat. I lifted today and didn’t do much cardio, so hopefully tomorrow’s run will not be such a crash and burn experience.

Questions

Anyone else struggling to train in this heat?

Any recommendations for not cooking in the heat, especially on long runs?

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3 Responses to “And That’s When the Creepy Guy Took My Picture”

  1. Chris August 2, 2011 at 5:00 am #

    I am hating this heat, I’ve been working out in the mornings in an attempt to avoid it. But even 5 am is to damn hot and humid. Glad the creep thing didn’t turn out bad for you. That would have definatly freaked me out.

  2. Sarah August 2, 2011 at 2:11 pm #

    The creepy guy didn’t get you!

    The heat has really been sucking! I have been trying to get out the door between 5 – 6am for my runs because once the sun it out, it’s really over.

  3. Coach Brian August 2, 2011 at 4:33 pm #

    I’m no pick up artist, but I do know a couple of things.

    1) If you’re already striking out, then “Hey, by the way, you have really great legs” probably isn’t going to salvage things. It’s best to learn what you can from the experience (ie. don’t stalk ladies on the running trail) and move on.

    2) If you have already struck out, then taking a photo of her ass as a consolation prize doesn’t really say much for your own self esteem. It certainly doesn’t do much for your chances with the other ladies on the trail. It is best to move on. There is better porn on the internet and that is best enjoyed in private.

    I’m glad you had dun during your track workout. At the end of the day, that’s what’s really important.

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