Making A Comeback

So… for those few who still occasionally check-in on my little corner of the internet, I haven’t blogged for ages. Like, since before my marathon. Which was months ago. 6 months ago. There were tons of changes going on in my life, new job, new apt, etc (new tattoos, new piercings, becoming a hippie and joining a commune… just kidding!). and blogging just had to take a back seat. Initially, I was only planning to take a break for a week or two. That week or two turned into a month or two and now here we are 6 months down the line. I also took a serious and probably much needed break from running. I didn’t stop completely (are you crazy? Running is my sanity) but I brought my mileage WAY down, and for the first time in a year wasn’t obsessively following a training plan. Instead, I took a a strange, new approach that maybe you’ve heard of called… running when you feel like it. On average I ran 2-3 times a week. I also haven’t raced since Marine Corps Marathon.

At first, I thought something was wrong, and there was a gaping hole where my training plans used to be. But frankly, I was burnt-out after spending the year training for my first race, my first half-marathon (and a few subsequent ones) and my first marathon. The break was much needed mentally and physically.

But my break-up with training plans couldn’t last forever. And lately I’ve felt my eyes drifting to my refrigerator, sizing up the empty space where my training plan used to me. So, I’ve decided a comeback is in order. A comeback to running (more than a few miles 2-3 times a week), a comeback to training plans, and a comeback to blogging. So here’s to what will assuredly hopefully be a successful return to the world!

A Triumphant Return!

Well, look at that. It’s been another month since I blogged. Pathetic. Timing is not one my virtues.

So, last time I blogged, I had just been informed that I was not going to be able to run Marine Corps Marathon unless a miracle occurred. I went from bawling my eyes out about not being able to run, to hurling objects at the wall, to eating a lot of chocolate, to begrudgingly accepting that I would not be able to run, to using cross-training to burn all my extra energy. It wasn’t pretty.

I had finally accepted that MCM was not a realistic possibility and started looking for a spring marathon to train for, BUT, last Wednesday an actual miracle occurred. My sports doctor cleared me to start running and to try for MCM.

I literally have pages of caveats (I can only run 3 days a week, no back-to-back running, I have to run 30 seconds to a minute slower than my usual pace, no time goals for MCM, etc.), but I get to try, I get to try to finish MCM!

I went back to my car and tried to jump up and down in the front seat (not easy, when you’re sitting down). I screamed and yelled and high-fived myself. It was awesome.

So, after my celebration party, the reality of what I was dealing with set-in. On Sunday, I’ll attempt to run my first marathon after having to take 5 weeks off from running. I have never completed a run over 16 miles. The farthest I have run since I was cleared to run is 10 miles. I felt amazing- strong, no pain, etc. But 10 miles is a long way from 26.2 miles.

Several people have expressed concerns that this might not be the best idea and maybe I should wait until the spring to run my first marathon. I know it’s probably not the best idea. I’m a marathon-ing virgin and my training is incomplete. But despite all the doubts, concerns and my own personal fears, I WILL be at the starting line on Sunday morning, and I will do absolutely everything in my power to cross that finish line. If I have to walk fine, if I have to crawl fine, but goddamn it I am absolutely determined to finish that race. I worked my ass off to run Marine Corps Marathon, and now that I’ve been cleared to try for it, I will give this race absolutely everything I have.

If things really start to fall apart, and I have to choose between finishing and re-injuring myself, then I will drop out and take a DNF and try again in the spring, but as long as my shin holds up I’m going to finish this damn race no matter what.

I’m well aware that it’s going to hurt like hell and that it’s going to be a massive mental struggle, but I’m nothing if not stubborn…

This cat has nothing on me

…so I’m hoping that stubborness combined with determination and adrenaline will get me to the finish line on Sunday.

Anyway, if you don’t hear from me again it’s probably safe to assume that I died attempting to complete Marine Corps Marathon.

Don't mind me, I'm just dying over here

If you want to follow my snail’s progress through the course you can sign up for social media alerts here.

I’ll try to post again before Sunday’s race to the death marathon, but otherwise you can expect an ugly post next week about how I can’t feel my legs, and will never, ever to something as stupid as sign up for a marathon again.

The Injury

So, I haven’t written for awhile, again. Sorry about that guys, I do love you all. And I’ve been trying to keep up with most of your blogs. I’ll do a catch-up post later in the week and then hopefully we’ll be back on track. And I promise to return tomorrow with ‘Fess It Up Friday. But first I have some crappy, crappy news to share.

I’ve been dealing with a recurring case of shin splints over the past few weeks. I didn’t think it was a big deal. I’ve dealt with shin splints on many previous occasions. I knew the drill. Ice, stretch, ibuprofen, rest days in between running, etc. I kept running. I did my 16-miler, I did my shorter weekly runs. I even tackled a hill run which I haven’t done for awhile.

That hill run was last Thursday. Last Thursday was the last time I ran. Over the weekend the pain in my right shin got worse. I woke up Saturday with a sore throat and a runny nose. No big deal, I’ll delay my 18-miler until Monday. I thought it was also give my shin a chance to rest. The pain get worse. It hurt when I walked, it hurt when I flexed my foot. It hurt when I stood around. I tried to think back, to remember if I had bashed into any large object (it’s not unusual, I am extremely klutzy), but I couldn’t recall anything that might be causing this pain.

On Monday I finally gave in and went to urgent care. The doctor was nice enough but totally useless. He prescribed me painkillers told me he thought it was probably a sprain, and asked me three times if I could remember running into something. Then he did the smartest thing he could have and wrote me a referral to a sports doctor.

Yesterday I went to the sports doctor. I knew what was coming but it hurt so much all the same. The doctor took x-rays, asked questions, felt around and then broke the news as nicely as she could. No running for at least a month, probably 6 weeks, and almost certainly no marathon, unless I wanted to do serious damage to myself.

I’m essentially in between shin splints and a stress fracture. Her words were, “You’re basically a run or two away from a stress fracture.” She told me I could cycle and swim, I could continue to lift weights, but only upper-body stuff. No elliptical and absolutely no running. If the pain is gone in 3 weeks then I can start using the elliptical. Return in 3 weeks for a follow-up and to discuss recovery strategy.

I made it through the rest of the appointment without crying. I asked questions and nodded my head and said I understood, but I was holding back tears the entire time.

As soon as I left the office I started to cry. At the receptionist desk I had tears streaming down my face while I handed over my credit card for the co-pay. I walked to my car and sat and bawled my eyes out for a good 20 minutes. I finally got my shit together and drove myself home where I sat on the couch and did nothing all afternoon.

The pity party won’t last. By nature I’m an optimistic and happy person, and in a few days I’ll have dealt with the news, I’ll get over. I’ll realize that as long as I continue to work-out through the healing process I’ll be able to come back as a stronger and smarter runner. But right now it hurts. I am completely crushed.

Eighteen months ago I was basically a couch potato. I wasn’t overweight, but I was on my way, I hated the way I looked, I felt awful all the time. So I decided to change. Eighteen months ago I couldn’t run for longer than a minute at a time. Now, I’ve completed three half-marathons, nine races and I was WEEKS away from my very first marathon.

I have poured my heart into training for the Marine Corps Marathon. I’ve trained through rain and heat waves and hurricanes. I ran 14-miles on a freaking treadmill during a hurricane. I’ve turned down invite after invite to go out so I could go to bed early on Friday night to wake-up for my long run on Saturday. I’ve ingested more peanut butter and pretzels than a normal person should. I’ve paid through the nose for shoes and fuel and practice races. I asked more of my body than I probably should have and it delivered again, and again and again. But not this time.

And so, with two long runs left to complete in my marathon training I’m dropping out. I’ll defer my entry to 2012. I know there will be other races, other marathons even, I’m young and healthy and will have plenty of opportunities. But to have come so close to crossing that finish line at the end of 26.2 miles and to have to quit now is breaking my heart. In the grand scheme of things this is not the bad, and I know that, logically, but it hurts all the same.

Underwhelmed

I know Hurricane Irene hit other parts of the Eastern coast hard (the Carolinas, Vermont) but, it completely underwhelmed me. I’ve lived through my fair share of summer thunderstorms, tornadoes, and snowstorms and my first hurricane was nothing more than a windy summer storm.

I love storms, and was oddly looking forward to  my first hurricane. But sadly, not only did the hurricane disappoint, it also forced my long run inside.

This week was extremely long, so when my alarm went off at 5 AM I knew there was no way I was getting up to start my long run. I wanted to sleep. So, I did. I knew I was taking a risk with the weather, but I also knew that I was operating on a serious lack of sleep and needed to catch up at least a little bit, or I would never make it through my 14-miler.

I dragged my lazy butt out of bed around 10 AM. I made breakfast and Leslie and I seriously discussed hitting the trail to run. Being the whiny little baby that I am, I was concerned about rain. On every single channel I get, the talking heads were rambling on about how bad the storm was going to be, how we needed to “batten down the hatches” (I hate that phrase!). So I bailed on our run and decided to do it on the treadmill.

I’m just going to say right now, I’ve made many mistakes in my life, some big, some small. Biggest mistake ever. I hate the treadmill on the best of days and this was not the best of days. A quick recap:

- I was tired

- I hadn’t fueled properly the night before (Brazilian food + alcohol)

- I had barely slept that week

- I barely slept the night before

- I was stressed out of my mind

- I was feeling super ADD

Like a good marathoner-in-training I told myself to suck it up and just go and do the 14 miles. I might not be feeling it, but I knew I needed to do it. It was abysmal. If I never see another treadmill in my life it will be too soon.

The Breakdown

Miles 1-3: sucked. I would start and then want to walk. I would start again and then feel like the pace was too fast. Or the pace was too slow. Or the incline was too steep. Or it wasn’t steep enough. You get the idea, right? My music wasn’t right; my clothes felt weird; I wasn’t wearing enough body glide, etc.

Miles 3-7: not quite as sucky. I got into my music a bit and sort of zoned out for awhile. Until mile 6 and then I was STARVING. I ate some Shot Bloks, and then doubled over with cramps for a mile. So it was back to being a suck-fest.

Mile 7: I got off the treadmill because I needed Gatorade. On any run over 5 miles I ALWAYS drink half-water/half-Gatorade. I did not have my beloved Gatorade on this run and for some reason I was completely fixated on the Gatorade. I was utterly convinced that if I did not get my Gatorade, I would not finish the run. So, I jumped off the treadmill, ran, in a hurricane, to my car, drove to the gas station, bought Gatorade and ice, drove home and got back on the treadmill.

Miles 7-9: These were a little tough. I hopped off the treadmill a few times to stretch. Stopping your long run and getting in the car and then starting up again is not conducive to a successful long run. I ate some more Shot Bloks around mile 9 and felt a little better.

Miles 9-13: I wanted to shoot either myself or the treadmill with a shotgun. Every, single, second of these miles sucked. I more than seriously contemplated getting off the treadmill and just calling it quits. I even justified it to myself. “I’ve already run x miles. I bet most people can’t do that on a treadmill. I don’t really need to do the full 14 miles. I did 14 miles in spirit.” I have no idea how, but somehow I kept going. I think it was magic. Or delusion.

Mile 14: ROCKED! I don’t know why the rest of the run couldn’t have been this way. I felt on top of the world. I was tired but I felt like I could keep running for miles. All I could think was “I’ve run 14 miles b******! Bring it on, because I just ran 14 miles!” If you had asked me to do a Batman or Spiderman impersonation right then I would have done it. And it probably would have ended injury, but these things happen.

The Aftermath

I finished around 630 PM, took an ice bath and ate a million pretzels. And cereal. And ice cream. And then this happened:

There was absolutely nothing to do. My options were drink champagne in celebration of my 14-miler, or watch every, single channel discuss Hurricane Irene. Can you guess which route I chose?

Eventually, I fell asleep. On Sunday morning I awoke to… bright blue freaking skies! I had run 14 miles on the treadmill for NO REASON. I won’t lie, I behaved like a petulant child and kicked a table and threw some clothes around the room. Mother nature and I are not getting along right now. Maybe one day, we’ll get along again, but that day is not today.

Questions

Feelings on Hurricane Irene? Anyone else think the media 0verreacted just a wee bit?

Fellow long-runners: I’m into unprecedented mileage, how do I keep my sanity?

‘Fess It Up Friday

…is finally back! I’m thrilled to be able to overshare with all you again. I know you’ve all been anxiously awaiting the return Fess It Up Friday, so here we go. And just to a little fun we’ll make this the mostly hurricane edition in honor of Hurricane Irene’s impending arrival.

1) I am extremely pissed off that Hurricane Irene is disrupting my 14-miler this weekend. Seriously? DC never gets hit with hurricanes and then the year I decide to train for a marathon suddenly we’re going to be pounded with the worst hurricane in a generation? And we have an earthquake in the same week?

Let’s get it together mother nature, I’ve got things to do.

2) I’ve never lived through a hurricane before. Or an earthquake for that matter. This is just shaping up to be a week of firsts.

I grew up in Minnesota and have survived more than my fair share of tornadoes, crazy summer thunderstorms, and snowstorms ten times worse than 2010′s Snowpocalypse. But earthquakes and hurricanes? Not-a-one.

3) When the earthquake hit on Tuesday and the building started to shake my first thought was, “Geez, I must really need some more coffee if I feel like the building is shaking.”

4) I am fully prepared for this hurricane with the following: beer, wine, chocolate, cereal, beer, peanut butter, beer, pretzels, rum and beer.

What’s that you say? I might need a flashlight or a hand-cracked radio? No, thank you I think I’ll be just fine with my beer.

5) I am going to be extremely pissed off if we lose power and I am not able to kill time screwing around on Pinterest.

Actually, if we lose power I’m going to be extremely pissed off, period. I can no longer be separated from my electronics for longer than 30 seconds. When we had to evacuate on Tuesday because of the earthquake what did I make sure to take with me? My iPhone. God forbid I should have to go an hour without checking Twitter or updating my Facebook.

6) When I did my 8-miler on Monday night, I started later than expected because traffic was a disaster. I ended up having to do a about 2.5 miles in the dark.

It turns out that at 23 years old I am still terrified of the dark. I was jumping at really loud crickets. There are no streetlights along the W&OD path so it was dark, dark, dark. The bonus? I was booking it those last 2.5 miles.

7) Totally unreleted to hurricanes, but I am a huge time-waster. I will literally spend hours looking up random junk in the internet. Then I spend another hour yelling at myself for wasting time and not doing anything and then I go back to doing nothing.

I should probably never work from home, because I will literally get nothing done.

8) When I was in Philly last weekend for HLS went dancing on Saturday night. My legs are still sore from dancing for so many hours. I may be able to run half-marathons but dance for a few hours? Apparently not.

9) I am crazy excited to go back to Minnesota for Labor Day weekend. Not beacuse I get to see my family and friends (though, I guess you guys are ok), not to hang out with my puppy or chase my little brother around the backyard. No, I get to go spend the day at the Great Minnesotan Get-Together, otherwise known as the State Fair.

Truth

I’m planning to gain roughly 10 pounds in that one day. If you think it can’t be done I’m open to bets. There will be buckets of cookies, walleye on a stick, deep-fried everything, milkshakes made from cows you just milked and of course my personal favorite cheesecurds.

This is what heaven looks like

Plus I can burn it all off by riding down the giant slide.

This is a perfectly legitimate form of exercise

I feel like I should make this an even 10 but I can’t think of anything else right now, so we’re going to leave it at 9. The number 9 doesn’t get enough love anyway.

Questions

Who else is ready to punch this hurricane in the face?

My Ragnar team needs two additional runners: anyone interested?

 

Marathon Nightmares

I don’t know if it’s due to recent work stress, or the fact that I am almost exactly 2 months away from running my first marathon, but I’m starting to have nightmares about Marine Corps.

I’m not usually prone to nightmares, in fact I rarely remember my dreams. I’ve never been big into analyzing dreams, and typically the only thing I can focus on in the morning is where the coffee is located.

But lately, I’ve been waking up in the middle of the night terrified out of my mind about this task that I have undertaken.

I’ve had dreams where I show up to the starting line sans shoes and have to run 26.2 miles in barefoot. I’ve had dreams where I show up completely naked and get laughed at by Marines.

I'm just calling my fellow streakers, they'll be here shortly

I’ve had dreams where I’m chased by rabid dogs and zombies and so I have to run a much faster pace than I trained for and I end up blowing up long before I get to the finish line.

Don't worry guys it's just like a tempo run

One night I dreamt that I slept through my alarm, and I missed the race that I have spent months training for. That night, I woke up, leapt out of bed, and sprinted across my room before I realized that a) it was 3 AM and b) it’s still August. I have two more months before Marine Corps.

I’ve never had trouble sleeping before, so I don’t know if this is a side effect of training and completely normal, or if I should be deeply concerened and run to the nearest medical professional before I become completely unhinged.

I’ve experienced plenty of weirdness during marathon training and made plenty of sacrifices. Feet covered in blisters, ice baths, no more drinking on Friday nights, weird looks from colleagues that can’t possibly understand why I would train for a marathon, limbs that swell on long runs, waking up at 5 AM to get my long runs in. So are crazy nightmares and lack of sleep just another thing to adjust to? Is this going to happen in every future training cycle I go through, or is this just something newbies experience?

Questions

Someone please tell me that they’ve gone through something similar, otherwise I’m going to think I’ve gone crazy.

Any advice as to how to deal with my wild and crazy nightmares?

Work It Out Wednesday

I’m obviously quite behind on these posts. I think I’ve  missed three weeks now? So instead of covering my daily workouts for the past three weeks I’m just going to do a recap of my training and how I’ve been feeling.

Week of 8/7-8/13

I felt on top of the world this week. I did my first multi-sport race on Sunday, swim + run and loved it. The triathlon season is almost over, but I plan to train for a triathlon next year,  maybe several.

Starting the run

End of the swim

My runs went well. I put my full effort into all of my workouts and felt strong and like I was making huge progress.I also ate well and got plenty of sleep that week. It was probably one of the best training weeks I’ve had during this whole marathon training process.

Week of 8/14-8/20

Apparently, fate wanted to pay me back for being on such a high the week before. I worked late almost every night, skipped several runs and I ate like crap. I felt tired, bloated and unhappy. On the two runs I managed to achieve my legs felt like lead and all I could think about was quitting.

It probably didn’t help that I raced a 20K on 8/14, just a week after my first multi-sport race. The 20K course was hilly and it rained and I was miserable. Leslie from DC Running Novice and were planning to run the race together, but we split up in the first mile after my calf started cramping. I finished, but it sucked and my hips were sore all week.

This is what serious yogis look like

I barely did any strength or cross-training, so the week was just one big fail

This Week

I got back on track by starting the week with an 8 mile run. My legs felt fresh, and I felt much better on this run than I had for quote some time. I weight-lifted and cross-trained yesterday and squeezed in a 5k on the treadmill. I had wanted to do 4.5-5 miles, but a 5k is better than nothing at all.

If I don’t die on Saturday’s run then I will hit a new personal distance record, 14 miles. I’m hard-core praying to the weather gods that this hurricane holds off until after my 14-miler as this run will be miserable enough without adding a Category 3 hurricane to the mix. Fingers crossed that all goes well.

Questions

Whose made it through tough times in their training and lived to tell the tale?

Anyone else have long run plans this weekend?